El Hazard: The Magnificent Sequel
Chapter 4

"Why? Why do these things happen to me?? It's so
unfair! Every time I cross over into another
dimension, something bad always happens to me! I'm
either running away from crazed soldiers, surviving
attacks by the Eye of God, or being harrased by store
clerks! I must have the worst luck in the universe!
I-"
"SHUT UP BACK THERE!!" The old woman barged into the
kitchen and threw a large cake of soap at Palnus,
nailing him square in the forehead.
Palnus tenderly rubbed his bruised forehead with his
fingertips. "Yeow! What did you do that for?"
"If I hear one more complain from you, JUST ONE, I'm
going to feed you to the dogs!! Now get to work
scrubbing on those dishes, understand??"
"Uh,er,yes ma'am!" Palnus grabbed the nearest wet rag
and began to frantically scrub away at the huge pile
over the sink.
*Hmmmph! I'm just like her slave. A slave, that's what
I am.*
Palnus' mind slowly drifted off to some earlier
events....

#Flashback#
Palnus stood in the middle of the plaza square. Afura
and the old woman were busy talking and they were
occasionally giving him strange looks.
What were they talking about? Could she...yes Afura,
my angel. She must be convincing the old lady to let
him go.
The old woman walked over to Palnus with a pleased
look on her face. "Your sister and I have reached an
agreement. You will work off your debt."
*What!*
She continued. "We've made all the necessary
arrangements of course. Your sister will stay free of
charge since I couldn't possibly make a pretty thing
like her work. You, on the other hand, have a lot of
work to do. So I guess you can start on the pile of
dishes at the back." She gestured at a HUGE pile of
plates stacked on top of each other.
*A-Afura...she sold me OUT??"
#End of flashback and back to present time#

Palnus' daydream was interrupted by the sound of
clattering dishes.
The old woman shoved a whole new tray full of dirty
dishes into the sink. "You've got to wash these too. I
want them spotless, got it?"
Palnus sighed and began to wash the new pile of
dishes. For the first time in quite a while, he really
wanted to go home.
The noise had woken Afura up.
*So much for sleep.* She stretched her arms and lazily
rubbed her eyes. She stared at the ceiling; the room
she was in was practically a monk's quarters, all
things considered. It was completely made of wood. Two
mats were on opposite sides of the floor and one small
dresser occupied the corner. On top, a ceiling fan
turned very slowly.
With a shake of the head, Afura exited the room and
decided to explore. She was in another world and there
was no reason for her to get bored.
She had already explored the restaurant which she
learned was very Japanese. In the back, she had Palnus
cursing to himself.
*Probably shouldn't bother him, he must be very mad at
me now.* Afura chuckled a little to herself and then
felt a little guilty. *Sure he can be irritating but
he's the only person I know in this world and I am
sure he is a kind person at heart.*

"Hi!"

Afura turned around to see that she was facing a guy,
who was shorter than her and had brown eyes and black
hair.
"I'm Takuya! Remember me? My dad said that you were
working at that obaa-san's restaurant..."
"Uh..yeah.." *Why does this guy keep talking to me? I
just want to be by myself now.* Afura shrugged.
"Hey listen, if you are going to be here for a while,
how about if I show you around. I know everything
about it. My dad has a library with lots of books
and... (blah blah blah yadda yadda yadda)......"
*Sigh..can't stop talking, can he? Wait, books?
BOOKS?...reading...end of boredom...*
"I'm sorry I didn't really introduce myself properly
when we first met. I'm Afura. Can I please see the
library?
"Sure, let's go."
Afura slipped out of the restaurant with Takuya.

*******************************

It had been three days since Groucho had stayed at
Henry's house. Groucho's Japanese was improving as he
had suppressed nearly all his bad language structure
and grammar. Of course, he wasn't exactly staying
there for free. He had to do all the household chores
whenever Henry had to go for work.
Kotomi was giggling as she played with Groucho's
antennae. Henry, being blind, still wasn't aware that
Groucho wasn't human. Kotomi, being the sweet innocent
child, of course knew that Groucho was a 'little'
different from the rest of her playmates but couldn't
see anything really wrong with Groucho.
Groucho was sweeping the living room. He put down the
broom and faced Kotomi.
"Kotomi, I am looking for a person of average height
and has black hair."
"........"
"Have you not seen such a person?"
"You know, you just described half the population in
Japan. Gee, Groucho, you're funny." Kotomi continued
to play with him.
Groucho sighed and started to tidy the sofa. Kotomi
got tired and started to go to bed.
"Oyasumi nasai Groucho."
"Oyasumi nasai Kotomi."
Kotomi went to bed. Groucho continued his work and
heard a strange sound. He turned to see a bee buzzing
around.
"Hmmm...you might be able to help me. I am looking for
Lord Jinnai and Queen Diva."
"Of Lord Jinnai, I know nothing of him. One of my
friends has mentioned about Queen Diva though."
"I want to ask you for a small favor. Please ask your
friend to tell Queen Diva where I am and to tell her
that everything is okay with me. Hopefully, I will
meet her soon."
"Sure, no problem."
The bee buzzed out of the window.

******************************

"You know, Ifurita. I feel bad just staying at your
place and not doing anything in return. I think I need
to find a job soon so that I won't be too much of a
burden."
Ifurita was wiping the windows of her apartment and
turned to face Diva who was speaking to her while
holding a cup of tea.
"Oh, Diva. You're not really any burden at all. But
what kind of job exactly did you have in mind?"
"I already have a job," Diva replied calmly, sipping
at her green tea.
"You do? How?"
"Remember the man you saw me with at the Departmental
Store?.." Ifurita scratched her head trying to
remember. "...His name is Koichi Igarashi. He met me
in the Departmental Store and bought me this dress.
And these shoes,"Diva added, tapping the shopping bag
at her feet with one of her new stilleto-heeled
sandals.
"Then we went for drinks and he told me about this
job."
"But what is it?"Ifurita insisted."What kind of job
did he offer you?"
Diva smiled. "I am to be a hostess. A hostess at his
palace, called the Dream House."
Ifurita's eyes were widening. Diva continued,"I'm not
sure exactly what a hostess does but I think a hostess
is someone who....butters up second rate men and make
them feel like the king of the world." She raised an
eyebrow, slightly puzzled. "Mr Igarashi said I had a
natural talent for it and I would be the most popular
hostess in Tokyo."

*****************************

He was a proud and noble warrior of the Phantom Tribe.
It had taken him a while to adjust to life on Earth
but he was getting used to it. For practical purposes,
he had adopted the Japanese name 'Tanaka Takezawa' to
blend in with the local populace. He was proud to be
the right-hand man of his lord, Lagus.
'Tanaka' surveyed the area. There were a group of
shops clustered under the name of 'Kirei Plaza'. One
little restaurant jutted out into the area which he
was surveying. *That had to go.* After all, didn't the
Mayor say that he was going to built a cigarette
factory in this area?
He walked in. There was a woman in her late-fifties by
the counter. A young boy(girl?) was scrubbing dishes.
"Palnus! Hurry up, you lazy good-for-nothing,"she
yelled.
Tanaka walked to that woman and said,"I presume that
you are the owner of this place."
She nodded.
"I am going to offer you this sum of money to sell
this restaurant to me."
"But what do you want this place for?" She seemed
puzzled.
"We need to develop this land. We are going to build a
factory to manufacture cigarettes."
"Cigarettes? So that you can give lung cancer to the
youth of Japan? Sorry, but this place is not for
sale." She grunted and ignored him.
He sighed and walked off. As he walked off, a young
girl caught his attention. She seemed strangely
familiar. She was indifferent to everything around her
and her eyes were glued to a book.
*Haven't I seen her somewhere before? Yes, she..she's
Afura Mann, the Wind Priestess. Wait. Now, didn't Lord
Lagus say that she is one of those he was planning
revenge on. After all, she was one of the Priestesses
responsible for the death of Kiriya.* He paused from
his thoughts to wipe a sweat off his cheek. *Lord
Lagus will be so pleased when I report this to him.
The other boy(girl?) seems familiar but I can't
remember the name right now. I'm sure Lagus will know
what to do next.*
He left the scene.

"Palnus! Hurry up, you lazy good-for-nothing!"
Palnus mumbled a reply and began to scrub even harder
on the dishes. His fifth day on the job hadn't been
any easier on him. In only three hours, the old woman
had made him fetch water, pick up rice from the
neighbours and scrub the kitchen floors. Palnus was so
exhausted from his work that he couldn't even
complain.
He had been observing the conversation between "the
old hag" (as Palnus liked to call her) and the strange
man in business suit and dark glasses.
*Hmm, who is he? The landlord? Coming to kick the old
hag from the restaurant?* Palnus began to envision a
lovely scene where the old maid was begging on the
streets for money. He chuckled at the thought. "It
would serve her right anyway...."
WHACK!
A spoon was thrown with deadly-precision and it hit
Palnus on the forehead, jolting him from his lovely
reverie.
"GET BACK TO WORK!"
"................."
That was all it took to make Palnus get back to work
again. "Uh, I guess I should get back to the dishes,
huh?" He ran back to the huge dish pile over the sink
and began to scrub away at them as if his life
depended on them.
After a few hours, Palnus dragged himself into his
temporary living quarters and collapsed onto the mat.
"Rough day, huh?" Afura casually asked. She had been
reading a book until Palnus walked in, and had briefly
put it aside for the time being.
The only reply Afura got was a muffled groan from
Palnus as he burried his face in his pillow.
"Okay, I'll take that as a yes," she picked up her
book and began to read it again.
*Hmph. Like she really cares...*Palnus bitterly
thought to himself. Palnus glanced up at Afura from
the pillow. "This is all your fault, you know. If it
hadn't been for you, I wouldn't be in this mess!"
Afura paused for a second and replied,"Did I cram all
ten bowls of soba noodles down your throat. You
haven't got anybody to blame except for yourself. I
could have just left you there and you could have been
arrested or worse. At least, we have a place to stay
and can keep close to each other..." Afura turned back
to her book and ignored Palnus.
*Damn. I hate it when she's right.* Palnus flipped
over onto his back and stared at the swirling blades
of the ceiling fan. Quite a warm day, today. After a
few minutes, he began to reflect on the events that
had happened today.
He still couldn't figure out who that guy in the
business suit was. The old woman hadn't been very
helpful, either. He had asked her several times over
the course of the day but each time he did, the old
hag whacked him over the head with her wooden spoon.
He rubbed the large bruise on the back of his head
absentmindedly.
He decided to drop the subject and shifted his glance
at Afura. She was still reading a book. *She's STILL
reading that book? Gosh, she's so booooring.* His eyes
scanned her from head to toe. *What a waste? Such a
gorgeous babe wasting her time with a book.* A thought
came up to his mind. *Maybe, I should liven things up
here a bit..*
Palnus leaped on top of Afura and latched himself
around her waist.
"Hey, what the heck are you doing? Get off me, you
little brat. Can't you see that I am reading?" Afura
was flailing her arms as she tried to pry Palnus off
her.
"Oh Afura, don't be so uptight. We can drop the sister
act now; no one else is here right now but us." He
raised his head so that his face was level with hers.
"Say, I know I've been kind of angry with you lately,
but I forgive you. What do you say we kiss and make
up?" Palnus puckered his lips and bent real close to
Afura's face, and....

BAM!
Afura whacked Palnus over the side of his head with
her hard-cover book, knocking him unconscious.
Afura dragged the unconsioucs Palnus by his feet over
to the side of the room, a safe distance from her. She
breathed a sigh of relief. She was pretty sure that
she wouldn't have to worry about him for the rest of
the night.
She looked at Palnus. He looked so peaceful. *He's
just a kid. He means well but he just doesn't know how
to show it.* Afura sighed. Gently, she took a pillow
and cradled it under Palnus' head. She took some extra
blankets from her bed and covered him gently. He
seemed so peaceful now and was now snoring quietly.

Afura was right, Palnus slept peacefully for the rest
of the night.

**************************

It was a quiet night and the stars were out in their
full might. Two figures were seating by the balcony of
Makoto's apartment enjoying the view of the night sky.
Ura was already asleep in Makoto's room.
"So Ifurita, you know it's strange. Diva used to be
our enemy. How things have changed. I remember how
Roshtarians would quake under the mere mention of her
name. I am so happy that she is now learning to trust
us."
"Yes, Makoto. She seems to have adapted well to life
in Japan."
Makoto Mizuhara looked affectionately at Ifurita. Her
beautiful long hair seem to sparkle by the light of
the pale moonlight.
"Who would have thought that I would have ended up as
a college student? 15000 years ago, that would have
been unthinkable." Ifurita smiled at Makoto. Makoto
seemed lost in thought. His eyes clearly were the eyes
of someone who had gone through a lot in life.
"I wonder what Diva is doing at the club right now?"
"Let's not worry too much. I'm sure she can take care
of herself." Ifurita drew herself nearer to Makoto.

Ura yawned as she opened one eye and saw the
silhouettes of two affectionate figures by the
moonlight. She sighed as she went back to sleep.....

*******************************

It had been quite a night at the Dream House. This was
one the Mayor of Tokyo's favorite haunt. Mr.
Igarashi's club was often frequented by two kinds of
people: the rich & the famous and the shady-underworld
types.
The Mayor often looked sincere when he was making one
of his political speeches but when he was around
beautiful women, he was often reduced to being a
lecherous, obnoxious pig. When he first arrived an
hour ago, he had been thinking of how this "Mr. Lagus"
seemed to have run his illegal Yakuza activities wtih
maximum efficiency. A good-looking woman had caught
his attention. She seemed foreign to him. While
drooling like a pig, he had asked Mr. Igarashi who had
told him that her name was Diva and she was a big hit
with the customers. He had made his move.....
An hour later, Koichi Igarashi sat with the Mayor in a
secluded back room of the Dream House. The Mayor was
rubbing his left eye, groaning, while Igarashi poured
him a cup of strong, black coffee. "Here, your
worship. This should help. Let me have a look at that
eye there." He tsked at the splendid shiner that had
already formed. "Oh dear, that's going to be a hard
one to explain to the Mrs. But I did warn you, your
worship. Our Diva is lovely, but she is a little
waspish when she's vexed."
The Mayor groaned again-not so much from the black
eye, but from his terrible hangover. "I can't remember
a thing. Not a thing. Dear God, what did I do? What
got her so upset?"
"Well, you were actually quite funny at first when you
started drinking. On and on you went about her running
away to Hawaii with you, and she kept refusing. She
thought it quite a laugh when you offered to give her
your car."
The Mayor's eyes opened. "I did?"
"Yes, and it was really funny because you had already
given her your other car half an hour earlier. She was
dangling the keys from her index finger. But you said,
oh my dear, that's just the Mercedes! You must have
the Cadillac convertible too! I'll have it painted
pink, to match your lovely hair! Oh, and you were in
fine spirits, my friend. I'll be sure to call a taxi
for you when you're ready to go."
"Oh my god. OHH my god. But what was it that made her
so upset?"
"Well, it certainly wasn't your singing, though it did
bother a few of the other people at the other tables,
and it was a bit of a rude song, even for my humble
establishment, but I'm sure Diva didn't understand all
the words. Her Japanese isn't exactly perfect, you
know."
"I sang? Oh, wonderful. I sang her a raunchy song and
I gave her both of my cars. I'll have to tell Kimiko
that they were both stolen."
Another groan escaped the Mayor. "I don't believe
this...but Diva--why did she....?"
Igarashi laughed, his white teeth flashing. "Well,
when she wouldn't come to Hawaii with you, you
insisted that she must at least have a dance with you.
You pulled her to your feet and that was when you
started to rub her fanny. (laughs). And that's when
she hit you."
"Oh, god. This has been the worst night of my life!
Well, you will fire her, won't you, Igarashi?"
"Fire her?" Koichi Igarashi shook his head and smiled.
"Your worship, she's made me more money tonight than
I've made in months, and not just in drinks." He held
up a videotape before the Mayor's eyes. "It was a
stellar performance, my friend, and I'm sure your wife
would love to see it."
The Mayor's mouth dropped open. It took him a minute
to realize what Igarashi was saying. "You...you...you
scheming, dishonest bastard!"
Igarashi bowed at the compliment. "I'll be in touch
with regarding my price, your worship. Now, I'll see
to that taxi. And as you're such a valued customer,
the fare will be on the house."

****************************

"Checkmate!"
Groucho sat looking at the board. He was playing a
game from Earth called "chess." It was new to him but
he was getting the hang of it.
"That's not fair Kotomi. You know I'm just a beginner
at this."
Kotomi started to play with Groucho's antennae. "You
know Groucho, I have never had so much fun before. You
are certainly the best friend I've ever had. Promise
me you won't ever leave me okay?"
Groucho looked at the earnest youngster and sighed.
All these feelings and emotions were new to him. She
meant a lot to him but...
But.
What was he going to do when he found his Queen again?
What was he going to do when he found Lord Jinnai
again?
Most important, what was he going to do when he found
a way home eventually?

****************************

Six miles away, at another apartment....
The shadowy silhouettes of two figures in bed could be
seen with soft moonlight coming in through the open
window. They were both not sleeping and both seemed
restless.
"Masamichi, dear?"
"Yes, Miz darling?"
"Do you think we will ever return to Roshtaria?"
"I'm sure we will. I'm sure everything will work out
fine. You know it's strange. When I was in El Hazard,
I often thought of returning to Japan. Now that I'm in
Japan, I can't believe that I am actually homesick for
Roshtaria. Strange, isn't it? I guess that's where my
real home actually is."
"Mmmm" Miz rested her head on Fujisawa's chest
listening to his heartbeat go thump, thump, thump
slowly......