|An Introductory Fic written by Davner
(In a quiet portion of the Royal Palace of Roshtaria...)
SHAYLA: GET BACK HERE! GIVE THOSE BACK!
(Fatora and Alielle, wearing nightgowns, come running around the corner into a dark
hallway. Fatora is waving a pair of red panties over her head in victory.)
FATORA: (Waving the panties.) I'M THE QUEEN OF THE WORLD!!!
(The two duck under a sudden fire blast.)
ALIELLE: (Squeals in fright.) Lady Fatora, are you sure this was a good idea?!
FATORA: Fortune favors the bold, Alielle! (Holds up the panties as evidence.)
ALIELLE: But Sister Shayla looks *really* mad...
FATORA: Ahhh, she'll get over it...
SHAYLA: (From behind them.) GET BACK HERE AND GIVE ME BACK MY
UNDERWEAR YOU LITTLE *BEEP!*!!!
FATORA: (Snorts.) Such language for a priestess! And to a princess of Roshtaria no
ALIELLE: Please, Lady Fatora, can we hide or something?! I really think she's mad!
FATORA: Oh, all right! (The two duck into another corridor and hide.)
SHAYLA: (Runs past the corridor.) WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, YOUR
OWN SISTER WON'T BE ABLE TO RECOGNIZE YOU!!!
(The two wait for Shayla's footsteps to fade.)
FATORA: (Holds up the panties.) Mission impossible? I think not!
ALIELLE: (Squeals and glomps Fatora around the waist.) Oh, Lady Fatora! Your skill
and knowledge of covert operations just makes me tingle all over! (She nuzzles against
Fatora.) I'll be your "Fatora Girl" anytime...
FATORA: Of course! (Rests a hand on the head of a small statue sitting on a pedestal.)
Now we just have to.... (She breaks off, and the two cry out in surprise as the wall they're
standing next to spins around, revealing a hidden passageway.)
ALIELLE: Lady Fatora! I'm scared! Hold me!
FATORA: (Peers down the passage.) Hmmmmmm.... Hey, Alielle, let's check it out.
ALIELLE: But it looks scary!
FATORA: Fine, then stay. (Starts down the passage.)
ALIELLE: (Squeaks and latches onto Fatora.) No! Wait! I'm coming!
(The two walk down the passageway until they arrive at a solid, oak door.)
ALIELLE: (Reaches up and knocks.) Hello! Hel-looooo! Open! Open! Open!
(Squeaks as the door slowly opens, bathing the two in soft yellow light.)
DEEP SPOOKY VOICE: Who disturbs my slumber?
(Fatora and Alielle clutch each other and begin shaking. A shadow falls on them.)
PRINCE OF LIGHT: (Yawns and holds his candle up to get a better look.) Seriously,
whatcha guys want? I'm trying to sleep here!
(Fatora and Alielle face fault at the sight of the man wearing a black cloak over a bright,
white outfit that seemed to shimmer in the torchlight.)
FATORA: Just who the hell are you?!
PRINCE OF LIGHT: I am...(Poses) THE PRINCE OF LIGHT!!!
(Fatora and Alielle just stand there, confused.)
PRINCE OF LIGHT: Um....I run the RRA...
(Alielle scratches her head and looks to Fatora. Fatora shrugs.)
PRINCE OF LIGHT: The Roshtarian Royal Archive....
(Fatora and Alielle pause.)
ALIELLE: Never heard of it.
PRINCE OF LIGHT: (Sighs.) Okay...you guys can *read*, right?
FATORA: Hey! You're addressing the Princess of Roshtaria!
PRINCE OF LIGHT: Anyway, this is where all the fan fiction in El Hazard gets
deposited. Stories, crossovers, MST's, song-fics, poems...
FATORA: Books, huh? Well, I guess we'll be going... (Turns and starts walking back
down the passageway.)
PRINCE OF LIGHT: ....lemons...
FATORA: (Rushes back.) Excuse me! Did you say lemons?!
PRINCE OF LIGHT: Um....yeah...
FATORA: (Stands straighter and points at the Prince of Light.) THEN BY ROYAL
DECREE I DEMAND YOU ALLOW ME TO INSPECT YOUR ARCHIVE AND ALL
ALIELLE: (Glomps Fatora around the waist.) YEAH!
PRINCE OF LIGHT: (Blinks in shock.) Um...of course! This way!
(The Prince of Light leads the two into the archive. Alielle looks around in awe at the
books and manuscripts around her.)
FATORA: We shall begin with lemons involving me and numerous adulterous affairs!
ALIELLE: I'm going to go see if there's anything starring Sister Shayla! (Runs off to
another part of the archive.)
FATORA: (As she's rummaging through several books.) Just curious, but why the hell
is this place hidden down here?
PRINCE OF LIGHT: Hidden? Didn't you pass the sign?
FATORA: What sign?
PRINCE OF LIGHT: Dammit! The janitor must have taken it again! That explains why
I haven't seen anyone down here in so long!
FATORA: Well, this place has atmosphere. I like it! I think we'll stay for awhile!
ALIELLE: (Runs up carrying an armful of books.) Lady Fatora! I found a story about
me and you! And one about Sister Shayla and another Earth boy! And one about Miss
FATORA: We can't read them all in one night, Alielle.
ALIELLE: (Pouts) But they look so good...
FATORA: We'll just have to come back! And I'm sure the others will want to see this
ALIELLE: Yay! Oh, Lady Fatora, how thoughtful of you to share this place and its
stories with your loving subjects!
PRINCE OF LIGHT: Um... Just remember to put the sign back up so people can find
this place, all right?
FATORA: No problem! You'll be seeing a lot more of us from now on!
(Fatora and Alielle, their arms laden with books and scrolls, start down the passageway.)
ALIELLE: (Waving with one hand while balancing books in the other.) Bye, Mr. Prince
of Light! We'll see you tomorrow!
PRINCE OF LIGHT: Bye! I'll see you then! And spread the word!
FATORA: (Carrying books.) What a great idea! Chronicling *MY* adventures in a
series of stories! Who would've thought!? (Stops at the revolving secret door.)
ALIELLE: Yeah! But I can't help thinking we've forgotten something important...
FATORA: Well, then, it must not have been *that* important.
(The revolving door spins around, depositing the two back in the corridor...right in front
of Shayla Shayla...)
ALIELLE: Oh...right...*that's* the something...
SHAYLA: Get ready.....TO DIE!!!
(The two scream and start running down the corridor as Shayla chases them! The door
opens again, revealing the Prince of Light, who sighs, shakes his head, and puts up a sign
Welcome to the
Roshtarian Royal Archive